Quotes
"Mary had a
little sheep,
With the sheep she went to sleep.
The sheep turned out to be a ram,
And Mary had a little lamb."
"It's like sitting on the back of an elephant with
an iron trying to get out the wrinkles."
"Good night, everyone- and remember- in this world,
if you wanna get ahead, you gotta learn to give a little!"
(On the beginning's of Aerosmith) "I'd been playing
in bands for something like seven years at this point.
And we were always trying to get ahead, trying to
rehearse and sound professional. But then I go to see the
Jam Band (Joe Perry and Tom Hamilton's band before
Aerosmith), and it blew me away. I wasn't expecting too
much. Then they got up there and did 'Rattlesnake Shake'
by Fleetwood Mac. And I said to myself, 'That's it. These
guys suck - they can't even tune their instruments. But
they have a great groove going that's better than any
fuck I've ever had.' I just knew that if I could show
them a little of what I knew, with the looseness and
balls that they showed up there, then we'd really have
something."
"The thing that really stands out in my mind about
Aerosmith is that we're still fucking together. Whatever
we've done together and whatever we've become, is second
to the fact that we're still doing this. I'm still in
love with these guys. I'm not saying it didn't take a lot
of work because drugs will take you and pull you apart.
But it wasn't anything we shot up or put up our noses
that gave us the edge - it was Joe Perry's fuck-all,
being as abrasive as that motherfucker is, and Brad
Whitford's ear, Tom Hamilton's well-aimed simplicity and
Joey Kramer's solid bed of backbeat. Keeping this band
together has been the hardest and the happiest thing
we've done in our lives. It's been a long time coming. So
for all the other stuff that comes from Aerosmith, the
most amazing thing is that we're still playing and still
having some fucking fun."
"I just want Aerosmith to always give me a hard-on,
that's all I ever ask for, for it to be the most special
thing in my life. As long as I look at it through those
eyes, it will always be that way."
(On the Jagger comparisons, when asked what he had to say
to people who said he looked like Jagger) "I say
jeans. Well what can I say? People who think I look like
Jagger never met him. These little innuendos about me by
people sitting thirty rows back, and all they see is that
blond cat next to me as Brian Jones. And Joe as Keith
Richards. And I'm supposed to be Jagger, running around.
Shit. Jagger makes up for his whole group. He never stops
prancing and dancing while the rest of them just stand
there."
(On Amazing) "The more I look back at my life and
the things that we did, the more I think there's got to
have been a plan for this band, either by a higher power
or an angel of mercy. I mean, that's how I like to look
at it now, because for all the shit I did, someone threw
me a rope. I look back on the times I OD-ed, didn't have
any money left in the bank, was let go off CBS because
the band sucked, couldn't even get my shit together to
change my clothes, but look at us now. When you actually
look back, it's pretty damn amazing, hence the song."
"Hey dude - this tricolor fusilli is fucking
outrageous!"
"Even in the old days, we'd make an effort. When I'd
go out to score on Eighth Avenue, I'd get my junk and a
chocalate doughnut. But I'd always also pick up one of
those pita-pocket health food sandwiches. You know,
something really good for me."
"I'd met Mick Jagger years ago when he invited me to
his house in Malibu, but back then I was too gagged to my
fucking ear lobes in coke and Tuinals. I was barely in
shape to knock on the door. But this time it was very
beautiful. The limo pulled into his tent in the tent
city, and he had a crib there for his daughter. We
hugged, and I told Mick, 'You don't know what it means to
be standing here with you after all these years. It's
amazing, because I woke up this morning and I got my
weekly report from the office, and right next to
Aerosmith at Number Two in airplay R&R is the Stones
album at Number One.' Of course, deep inside I'm thinking
to myself, 'And watch out, because we're going to knock
you right off the charts, motherfucker.' "
"What makes me feel good is that after all these
years, the ideas that Joe Perry came up with worked and
all the kids loved it."
"Hey, man, if anyone ever tried to smack any of the
5 of us,they'd be shot."
"We were one of the biggest bands in the world.No
one tried to tell us ANYTHING. And if they did- they were
history."
"When people think of Aerosmith, I want them to
think of the music we've made and nothing else. I don't
want the resposibility of some young kid trying to live
his life like I did back in the 70's."
"Kurt Cobain, when he did his videos, you look into
his eyes and he couldn't even face the camera; he was in
pain and I'm angry about Kurt. This guy didnt have to die."
(describing himself in 3 words) "Late, great, debate."
"Its hard for me when they call me things like the
Godfather of Hard Rock. Its almost like Im really shy and
don't wanna hear it. I'm honored, but I get kinda
embarrased. I can't act like I'm a Godfather because I
dont think I am one mentally. When they say that to me, I
say'Wheres the hubbub? I'm just a fuckin asshole like you
are.' "
"Aerosmith-one of the 10 best bands today? Yeah
definitely."
(about the days of drugs and excess). "I used to
think that I spent so much time getting high on stage in
the 70's and 80's that I didn't take advantage of the
ladies...I was in some corner somewhere. That's a regret,
it's not much."
"What goes on in your head? How can you go home and
write records? You're full of shit."
"But, you know, if Joe Perry can get straight, then,
REALLY, anybody can."
"I remember the first guy who offered me a joint in
the bathroom. I said 'No, man, I've got enough problems."
"Rock 'n' Roll is about a backbeat you can fuck to,
but it's also about saying 'fuck you' to people who don't
get off on freedom. We're protecting our right to rock."
"You got the right key baby, but the wrong keyhole."
"I'm BAAAAACK in the saddle again."
"F.I.N.E. - Fucked up, Insecure, Neurotic, Emotional"
"The buzz that you be gettin from the crack don't
last/I'd rather be O.D.'in on the crack of her ass."
"Love's 4 letters aint' in my dictionary."
"I'm looking to be the lounge act on the space
shuttle so I can sing "Walk this Way" on the
ceiling."
"Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the
most!"
"Here lies Tyler, the Demon of Screamin', Who never
woke up from the Dream he was Dreamin' Until oneday he
drank some magic potion--Now all that's left is Sweet
Emotion."
(what ST wants on
his Tombstone)
"Sex, drugs, and rock n' roll! Take out the drugs
and there's a lot more room for the other two."
"Slash looks like Joe, Joe looks like Keith, I look
like Mick, Mick looks like a black man, black man
invented the blues, blues had a baby and names it rock n'
roll, and dude looks like a lady an all that other stuff."
"We paved the road, so to speak. So why not fucking
get in our car and drive down it again?"
"Shit fire and save matches, fuck an duck and see
what hatches."
"Good nite god bless and dont forget to wear a
rubber."
"Something tells me we ain't in Kansas anymore Yodo
Yah ah ah ah ah!!!"
"People thought we were all washed up. But we came
back to KICK SOME ASS."
"It's not the COUGH that carries you OFF. . . . It's
the COFFIN they carry you OFF IN."
"Well, I took a perfect pill this morning, Bruce.
Along with a suck pill"
"I'm fuckin' flyin' baby!"
"Moist. That's a *good* word. I like that word!"
"It's R&B. It's those 2s and 4s. It's like
fucking...you know? You can really *fuck* to a good
Aerosmith song!"
"F-C-K. The only thing its missing is U"
"We weren't too ambitious when we started out. We
just wanted to be the biggest thing that ever walked the
planet, the greatest rock band that ever was. We just
wanted everything. We just wanted it ALL!"
(During the song Stop Messin' at a concert) "On the
guitar, musical alchemist, playing and singin his ass
off, Mr. Joe Fuckin' Perry!"
"The light at the end of the tunnel . . . IS YOU!!!"
(at Woodstock, '94)
"Good evening . . . thanks for inviting us to your
party . . .I hope you don't mind if we KICK YOUR ASS with
some rock 'n' roll!!" (at the beginning of shows)
Do you want the old shit, or the new shit? (taking
requests, about halfway through shows)
(When asked what's the best revenge he has ever gotten,
Steven responded) "Our comeback."
"If we hang ourselves, it's going to be on the tree
of creativity."
"I really don't feel and age gap with our fans, but
then again, we don't create one. You have to be in touch
with what younger fans are going through in their lives,
and I think we are. Anyone can write mature songs. It's
harder to write songs about what you really are, and
we're all kids at heart."
"We would like to help you out, which way did you
come in?"
"You have no idea how much it costs to look this
cheap."
"If you have a candle, the light won't grow any
dimmer if I light yours off mine."
"Now that I'm sober, I deserve to get laid."
"Keep your nose to the grindstone - It sharpens yer
boogers."
"The things that come to those who wait may be the
things left by those that got there first."
"I love every bone in a womans body, especially mine."
"Everything I've ever loved was immoral, illegal, or
grew hair on your palms."
"And remember, the light of the tunnel may be you,
and it's not the light of an incoming train."
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